A woman from Winchester was driving

A woman from Winchester was driving down the road when she passed over a bridge and saw a cop waiting with a radar gun on the other side. The cop pulled her over, walked up to her car with a smug look, and asked,

“What’s the rush?”

She replied, “I’m late for work.”

The cop said, “Oh yeah? What do you do?”

“I’m a Rectum Stretcher,” she answered.

The cop was confused and asked, “A what?”

“A Rectum Stretcher!” she repeated.

“And what exactly does a Rectum Stretcher do?” the cop asked.

“Well,” she said, “I start by inserting one finger, then move to two, then three, then four. Once my whole hand is in, I move it around from side to side, until I can get both hands in. Then, I stretch it out until it’s about six feet.”

The cop, shocked, asked, “And what do you do with a six-foot… um, thing?”

She grinned and said, “Give him a radar gun and put him behind a bridge!”